Guest post by Brand Ambassador Sarah Lollis
I am sharing a topic very near and dear to my heart with you today. A topic that has become more common to talk about, but is still hard for a lot of people to open up and share about (which is totally understandable).
My husband and I are parents to our sweet 4 month old, Noah. But before Noah was born we experienced two miscarriages.
It is so hard. You are ready to become parents, you are so excited, and then you have a devastating loss. Then you get pregnant again and you hold your breath the whole time. Then you have another loss. Then you try for 7 months with no luck. Finally you get pregnant again and you really hold your breath this time. And then you finally hear the baby’s heartbeat and you can breathe again (until the next appointment at least).
It is a never ending process of holding your breath and being anxious. I want to share my top tips with you that helped me get through pregnancy after loss.
Have a team behind you that you TRUST!
I cannot say it enough, if you do not think your doctor is giving you the best possible care then find a doctor that will. Reach out to other outlets as well! I started therapy after my second miscarriage and continued it throughout my whole pregnancy (and still go because motherhood is hard haha), so if you feel that could benefit you look into talking with someone.
I also saw a chiropractor and acupuncturist throughout my pregnancy to help with my stress and to keep my body comfortable. All of this was a great way to have extra support and keep my body feeling good!
Tell who you want to tell when you want to tell them!
If you want to tell everyone the day you pee on the stick, great! If you want to wait to tell everyone until after that first ultrasound, awesome! If you want to wait till the third trimester to tell everyone, power to you!
Telling someone you are pregnant will not cause a miscarriage. So tell the people you want to tell when you want to tell them. Support is so important after you have experienced loss and I recommend having that one friend or one family member you can confide in.
Stop blaming yourself!
This was not your fault and once you accept that, your current or future pregnancy will be so much easier on you.
Cherish EVERY second of your pregnancy and document everything!
I cannot say this one loud enough! After you have experienced loss you can be scared to document in case something happens again, I get it. But take the pictures, do the cute way of telling people, have a gender reveal, go on the baby-moon, get an extra ultrasound just because. Do all the things, I promise you won’t regret it!
Take a deep breath
Before that next appointment, before going to the bathroom, before you google another random symptom. I know, I know, it is SO hard and I have been there but before you go into a spiral because of x, y, z take a deep breath, you got this!
Decorate the Nursery!
This is a great way to celebrate the pregnancy and keep you distracted. I always found that finding ways to keep myself busy was so helpful. Pick a theme and get to work! And don’t forget to add your favorite Parker Baby Co items to the mix, like the Oatmeal Diaper Caddy and the Birch Diaper Backpack (my personal favs!)
Feel all the feels
This is my final tip, and probably the most important one. I am not going to lie to you, pregnancy after loss is SO hard, but it is also so rewarding. So feel the feels.
If you are anxious one day for no reason that is okay, if you are scared to call the doctor and ask a question because you called yesterday, who cares, call them! This is why it is so important to have a good support system because you are going to have hard days and on those days you need to have people behind you that love you and support you.
I hope these tips help you out on your journey to bringing your rainbow baby into the world. Whether you are in the thick of it right now or you are on the other side of it, I stand with you and so do so many others. And when your baby is finally here you can tell them how hard you fought for them. Never lose hope!
Our sweet 4 month old with the Parker Baby Co Changing Pad looking cute as ever. I promise the journey is worth it in the end! You got this mama!!! :)